Do you know when to let go?

Took an early morning flight to Delhi and drove down 45 KM to Sonepat and checked into a hotel that looked very ordinary from the outside, but exquisite inside. 

However, I will reserve that experience to the next blog.. 

The locality was full of Dhabas that are known for their mouth watering parathas.

People from around Sonepat throng at these Dhabhas over weekends for relishing all kinds of Parathas served with a knob of freshly made butter the size of a tennis ball.

Atharv and I ordered 6 parathas and finished in no time!

Atharv had a swimming competition the next day, so he chose to take a nap. I stepped out to visit the nearby Hanuman temple as the 15 foot statue attracted me. 

The temple was by the Delhi Amritsar highway and I had to walk about 500 M.

As I walked down the service lane, I saw a dog sitting by the roadside howling. I didn’t pay attention until I saw her pup trying to play with her. As I looked closer, I saw another pup lying on the other side of the road, surely hit by one of the vehicles on the busy highway.

The mom was trying to get to the pup, but was unable to do so as the traffic was quite heavy. As I was moving on, a thought struck my mind! what if the mom desperately crosses the road and gets hit by one of those monstrous vehicles, and who will take care of the other pup?…

Then I managed to cross the road without getting hit myself, I saw the pup bleeding in the mouth and not breathing. Her body was still warm, so the hit must have happened just a while ago..There was nothing much I could do. But I could not bear the sight of the mom which was now looking at me (at least it felt that way..), howling for help.

I picked up the pup, walked towards the mom crossing the road. Although she hesitated, couldn’t resist coming close to me. I placed the motionless, breathless pup next to the mom and took a few steps back. 

She came close, smelt and tried to move the pup in vain…

It took merely a minute for the mom to realize that it was over. She just left the dead pup and started walking in the other direction. Unaware of what happened to his sibling, the other pup continued to play with his Mom biting her tail and running between her legs. The mom simply kept walking, did not turn back even once. 

I stood there for few minutes hoping that the pup would get up and run to her mom or the mom would come back and somehow revive the dead.

With a heavy heart I left from there, visited the beautiful temple, walked back to the hotel room and tucked in right next to Atharv who was in deep sleep.

This experience reminded me of the preface from Robert H Shuller’s ‘Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do’.

I have seen hundreds of articles to help us humans: ’10 tips’, ’20 ways’, ‘power of’, ‘learning to, let go, but this dog taught me this invaluable lesson in just one minute!

I wrote this story to express my gratitude to the dog who taught me how easy it is to ‘LET GO’.

What do you want to let go today?


What’s your balance?

If you carry your childhood with you, you never become older.

                       – Abraham Sutzkever

Living in a village called Gorur near Hassan, where my dad worked in PWD, I had tons of freedom as a kid as I studied in a Government school where there was absolutely no pressure on studies. Most of what I remember from childhood is playing – played in the morning till the school bell rang, played in the evening till I could play no more, played during vacations in the foot long grass fields by the riverside, jumped in the canal and played in water for hours, plucked fresh and raw guavas and mangoes from the trees (even got caught and punished at times..), played in rainy season stomping and rolling on the muddy puddles.

Dad tried to teach me during exams but I used to outsmart and escape. The scale he had next to him was never a threat, the most he did was to wield it to no effect…

The two days that he would travel to visit grandfather in Bangalore used to be the toughest days as I never wanted him to be away. However, he used to bring utmost joy when he would present me with Amar Chitra Katha books which I used to adore reading. Those books also made me a hero among my friends as no one had them those days.

At 13, I was a part of “family decision making system” as I was valued much beyond my age.

My dad was a downright simplicist. 

Nothing would upset, anger, frustrate, dissapoint, depress, demotivate, demoralize him…..basically his motto seemed to be the happiest person on earth irrespective of what was happening around him.

I thought it was going to be very easy to be like him when I grow up, the reality of which I started understanding only when I became a dad and started experiencing situations that tested my integrity and true self.

Things are so different from then to now. I realized it’s not practical to emulate my dad how much ever I wished to.

The demands of the education system, rat race at workplace, the expectations from the society, ego etc. continued to challenge my role as dad as I could no more be myself  but had  to think of what “dads of now” do in such situations. 

I keep thinking how to leverage on my dad’s simplistic approach to everything.

After 45 years in a son’s role and 17 years in a dad’s role, I can see that I am less of myself and more of what the situation needs of me, the right balance remains under exploration .

What’s your balance?